I'm not sure how to talk to friends about my loss...it is the largest loss of my life- ever to be- but yet- I find myself only talking to friends when they ask. I want to scream and yell about my experience- for I experince something new each day.But most seem not to want to know.so I hold my breath.Hold it inside for those who ask- those I feel are strong enough to listen.Care. Last week I was asked because a friends father has been diagnosed with lung cancer.My heart breaks to hear the news. My heart also overwhellms with memories- but I feel it a kind gesture, asking me information about the disease-about the experience one goes thru trying to fight for anothers life..watching one fight for their own life...and perhaps not be sucessful.......watching one die.I now have that experience.
Not something I studied for.
I TRULY believe no one understands or feels death the way someone who is in the room with a person- with them for their FINAL breath on Earth understands the process- FEELS the loss as they wait...watch their loved one breath out for the last time, does.
It IS an exhale of breath that ends life.
Life chose me to experience this- and I want to be there for others- for I know my mother would want me to be supportive (and I want to be myself) to another in her situation.My mother died.She no longer lives- but can live thru me- thru my words- caring and kind heart.My advice is to touch the heart- as much and often as possible.Be there- let the person who is dying KNOW how imparative to your life they are.Love them.Hold them.for they are afraid as well.And there is no going back.I can not know what one goes thru when they know they are terminal.From what I have seen- it is a Fearful, scary life one leads until they pass...The pain of experience, of loss reaches into the depths of those who have lost a loved one.The most important thing we ALL, need- want is to be remembered.Remember.
Always.